DBT Alphabet of New Year’s Resolutions
By Dr. Judi Sprei
A – Acceptance – This year I will work on accepting my emotions as they are without making them bigger or smaller.
B- Breathe – Ahhhh… I will remember to breathe!
C- Contribute – I will be mindful of my contributions and also be a cheerleader for myself and others. I will Cope Ahead to avoid drama and distress in my life.
D- Distress Tolerance – I will use my distress tolerance skills to avoid making things worse. And let’s not forget that D also stands for Dialectics!
E – Effectiveness – When in challenging situations, I will ask myself, “How can I handle this effectively?”
F- Feelings – I will accept that my feelings are not things to avoid like the plague! Feelings are just feelings.
G – Goals - I will continue focusing on both my long term goals and my short term goals.
H- Hope – I will be hopeful about my present and my future.
I – Interpersonal effectiveness – I will use my interpersonal effectiveness skills to improve my relationships and to have less chaos in my life.
J – Just do it! I will use the Just Do It skill rather than have a daily battle over things that I need to do to have the life I want to live.
K – Kindness- I will treat myself and others with loving kindness.
L – Love – I will love myself and cherish those I love.
M- Mindfulness – I will practice mindfulness meditation on a regular basis. I can feel Masterful about being mindful.
N- Non-judgmental – I will foster a non-judgmental attitude.
O – Opposite Action, One mindful, Observe – Lots of O words to keep in mind.
P - Participate – I will participate in my own life in a nonjudgmental, one minded and effective way. I will use Pros and Cons to help me make and enact decisions about my target behaviors.
Q – Quiet – I will quiet my self-judgments, my obsessive thinking and my negativity. I will aim to spend some quiet time with myself each day.
R – Radical Acceptance – I will accept what is totally and from deep within myself.
S – Self-respect - I will keep in mind self-respect when working on interpersonal effectiveness. I will Self-soothe even before things get rough.
T – Teflon mind – I will use Teflon mind to let worries and anxieties slide right out of my brain! I will Turn My Mind back toward acceptance over and over again.
U – Understand – I will be understanding of myself and others.
V- Velcro Mind – I will use Velcro mind to hold onto the positives in my life. I will reduce my Vulnerability as much as possible and be mindful when I am in a vulnerable state of mind. I will remember my Values.
W – Wise Mind – I will touch base with wise mind often and use its wisdom as a guide. Willingness is another W word.
X – I will accept that no one is perfect and that even my therapist can’t come up with a DBT word starting with X!
Y – You – I will treat you with respect and remember that not everything you do is about me.
Z – Zen – I will practice mindfulness, stillness and acceptance.
Have a DBT filled New Year!